#Winning
Feeling pretty confident as a parent? Nothing like a little daylight saving time to take you down a notch.
Let’s go back a month ago or so. We have a three bedroom house and are welcoming our third baby soon, so our two girls were destined to share a room. Which is totally cool. Until you actually put them in the same room for a nap, it goes unbelievably not well, then decide this is a good time to weigh your pregnant self. #ivehadbetterideas
Now, I know that growing a human and gaining weight go hand in hand, but the self weigh-in coupled with the spiraling from the irrational fear that my children would never sleep again now that they share a room made for a pretty epic meltdown at mass an hour later. I did recover from this trauma, started staggering their bedtimes a bit, and except for the occasional nap, it’s been going pretty well. Until daylight saving time hit this weekend.
On Sunday - my kids were dreams all day long - slept in (for them), took great naps (after coerced), played at park, etc. Then came bedtime. They usually go to bed at 7. Those fools weren’t asleep until 9:30. And it wasn’t a “let’s stay up and laugh and play sweetly in our shared room until 9:30.” It was, “let’s cry and yell and scream bloody murder while we egg each other on until 9:30.” Mommy did not react well to this. Mommy lost her shizz.
This was not full when I started. I swear.
Is there a draft?
Frantic dry sesh.
I continued to go in their bedroom (after I told them 87 times I wouldn’t), I threatened/bribed/yelled multiple times (even though I told myself I wouldn’t), I spanked one and medicated another (I mean, she has a cold, I think), and then they finally fell asleep. Since alcohol isn’t an option I did the next best thing and finished off what was left of the half gallon of Blue Bell we had and collapsed on the couch feeling like a total momsaster (mom disaster.) Actual roller coasters? Awesome. (We burned through Astroworld season passes as a kid.) Emotional parenting roller coasters? Terrible! How can two tiny humans be so frustrating?
I’m sure many of you can relate. And not just in regards to daylight saving time, but ALL.the.time. Instead of focusing on these kinds of moments as #momfails, I like to think of times when I struggle as #winning. Because let’s face it - we need the positive spin.
That being said, you know you’re #winning as a parent when:
You have more snot than sweat on your Lulus.
Your potty trained toddler poops her pants during your nephew's baptism.
Your potty trained toddler pees her pants on the way to the doctor and goes pantless in December for three hours because you stopped packing spare clothes months ago.
You tell your kids the park is closed today because you don’t feel like taking them.
You tell your kids there's no macaroni and cheese left and then you eat the last portion.
You wash your kids’ loveys, forget to dry them, and frantically give a power blowout before bedtime.
You drop your kid off at the Y childcare and fail to read the framed letter stating there was a lice outbreak over the weekend & they're *pretty sure* all is mediated.
You skip the Y, get Whataburger instead & drive to the park. You see a friend taking her kids to the porta potty while you stay in the car & chow fries in the shade. (I didn't come to the park to play, I came to the park to eat - why are you looking at me like I'm the weird one?)
You give your kids food in the car, look back, and the only things being eaten are paper napkins and Mickey Mouse’s right arm.
Your toddler chases her dinner with a fat gulp of Johnson's baby shampoo while you bathe the baby.
Your baby takes an aggressive bite of yogurt, starts coughing, and you realize she’s swallowed part of her plastic spoon.
You bring your toddler, your bag, and your drink in from the car while talking on the phone, look around for the baby and realize she’s still in the garage.
You peek in the rear view mirror and only see the back of your baby’s head. Because she’s rolled around in her car seat. Because you forgot to BUCKLE HER IN.
My friend’s kid ate a box of Dramamine like it was her job and I know another who washed down her breakfast with a little lighter fluid from a Tiki torch. Things happen! Things get eaten. Kids fall. Parents fail. But as one of my dear cousins reminded me recently, God doesn’t call the equipped, He equips the called. Thanks be to God for that.
“And if God’s called me, then it’s bigger than me, and the only way I’m going to accomplish it is by the strength of almighty God. Don’t shrink back. You’ve got exactly what you need.” Victoria Osteen
Who else out there is #winning?
The spoon.
